Don’t Date Him Girl

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Guys are so difficult to understand sometimes, right? We ladies try, but often getting over the language barrier is tough. At DDHG, we’ve compiled a list of common guy phrases and actions and tell you what your guy really means when he says or does these things!

1. He talks about other women incessantly. You know, you could be having a conversation with your man and all of sudden you’ve got to hear about a past girlfriend, his horrid ex-wife or even some celebrity that he’s lusting after. This is a bad sign, ladies. He could be pining away for these women and looking at your as the girl he settled for. After all, he can only interject these women into your conversations so often before it starts wearing on your nerves! Talk to him about this and find out where his head is and what he’s thinking. You don’t want to be some guy’s second fiddle! You can tell him that if these women are on his mind so much, perhaps he should leave you and get back together with them!

2. He flirts with other women like waitresses, flight attendants and clothing store clerks. This, ladies, is another very bad sign. Your guy may be insecure and feels the need to boost his ego by flirting with these other women who are usually in customer service roles, so they have to be nice to you anyway. Men often mistake that as a sign that the woman behind the counter likes him, wants to be with him and wants to have sex with him. Most likely, none of the above are true, but for guys, just the thought is gratification enough for them. This is immature behavior on your guy’s part and if he can’t curb it, you’re going to have to kick him to the curb!

3. He tells you that he wants to see other people. Ladies, this one is pretty clear, wish him good luck and move on so you can find a guy who knows what he wants!

4. He needs his space. When a guy tells you this, believe him and get the heck out of there! Don’t waste another minute in a relationship with a guy who doesn’t want you around! Once he’s had time to figure out whatever it is that requires him to have his space, he’ll probably talk to you about it. But don’t hold your breath, when guys say this, it’s often because they’re looking for a gentle way out of the relationship with you!

5. He shares all of his problems with his friends, but asks you not to share with yours. This one is simple. He doesn’t want your friends to know what a cad he can be at times. But if he’s letting his entourage know all about your problems at home, feel free to do the same. Once he knows that you’re behaving just like he is, he’ll stop and you can work on your problems together as a couple and not as a group with his beer buddies!

There Are Only Four Types of Men in the World

Have you had your share of lousy relationships with men who were either notorious cheaters, skilled liars or pitiful pushovers urgently in need of a backbone? I know I have. My girlfriends most certainly have. Come to think of it, nearly every woman I know has been with these types of men. Through my own dating foibles and that of many of the women I know, I’ve discovered there are only four types of men in the world. So the next time that handsome hottie chats you up at the bar, use what you will learn from reading this to recognize his type quickly!

The Pleaser

This is the guy who attracts a woman because of his perceived ‘sensitive side’. You know ‘” the guy who understands exactly what it feels like to menstruate or get a Brazilian bikini wax. He’s so sensitive and in synch with you that he will spend hours shopping with you for the perfect dress. At first, you will fall in love with this guy. What woman wouldn’t want a sensitive guy who caters to your every whim? Apparently, not many! A recent DDHG poll found that over 63% of women said they’d prefer a bad boy player to a pleaser! Huh? Ladies, what are you thinking? We all know how a player operates, right?

The Player

This guy looks great on paper. But in real life, this guy is the classic Casanova. You know the type ‘” suave, smart and sexy. He’s just the piece of eye-candy that can reel a girl in and cause her to have a momentary lapse in judgment. At first, a player appears to be the perfect guy. That is, until the moment when you realize that you’re one of the many women The Player is juggling. You’ll see the well-known symptoms of a Player in this guy once you start dating him; he doesn’t return your call for days, ‘works’ a lot and is always extremely busy with his mom. But what if you could spot a player before he even offers to buy you a drink at that crowded bar? You can, if you take matters into your own hands first. (1) Examine what you’re wearing. If you’re flashing too much cleavage, the guys you attract will most likely be players. Showcasing your generous assets is an open invitation for a shrewd Player to chat you up and slither his way into your life. (2) Check out his demeanor. If he’s confident to the point of arrogance, he’s probably a Player. (3) And the dead giveaway, when he eyes other women as he’s talking to you. As you’re talking, he’s sizing up your chest and looking around the room to see if there’s anyone else worth his attention in the room.

The Pro

This guy is very close to perfect. He’s handsome, works hard, often owns his own business. He’s also very focused on his goals. He’s laying the groundwork for a great future, but probably won’t have any time to enjoy it. You know the type. The guy who tells you he’s got to have a $1 million in the bank before he has a kid and he really means it. If you meet a Pro just before he achieves his lofty goals, you may have just found out next guy!

The Perfect Man

There are a few words that describe the Perfect Man ‘” sexy, seductive, sensitive, sweet and stable (both emotionally and financially). These are all the ingredients that make up the elusive perfect man. This rare breed of male is almost as elusive as the Lochness Monster, but unlike the legendary sea creature, the perfect man does exist. I married one. So now that you know how to spot the 4 types of men out there, you’re armed with all the wisdom you’ll need to find Mr. Right. Good luck!

Be sure to visit http://www.DontDateHimGirl.com for more valuable dating advice

Going green in every aspect of our lives is important. The future of our planet depends on us and how we take care of it. You can recycle and use less water, but can you green up your love life? Most certainly! Here’s how:

1. Plan the perfect green date! Skip the pricey restaurant for dinner and surprise him with an environmentally-friendly picnic under the stars at a park or even in your own backyard. Use reusable plates and utensils instead of disposable ones!

2. Organic can be orgasmic! Hit the local farmer’s market and prepare an entirely organic meal for your hottie. Organic foods are grown without toxic pesticides and fertilizers, making them good for you, and great for the planet, too!

3. Give green gifts! The holiday season may be behind us, but there are many occasions throughout the year to give green gifts to your loved ones! The Robomow Lawn Mower ($1,400) is environmentally-friendly and cool. The Gidget Gadget case provides eco-storage for your man’s iPod ($28). It’s fabulous!

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1. Men fall out of love because they start to flounder in their relationships. They lose their way.

2. They lose their way because of a myriad of things – stress, kids, financial problems. And who is the person who goes through all of this with a man? A woman!

3. Whether a guy is in a committed relationship, engaged or married, the woman experiencing a man’s stress or feeling the burden of financial problems starts looking not so attractive after a while, leading the man to fall out of love.

4. Slowly, those problems creep into the fabric of a relationship and a man forgets what made him fall in love with that woman in the first place.

5. When things get tough, men go careening off the relationship cliff and often don’t look back, also leading them to fall out of love.

What can you do about this? Check out the book Why Men Fall Out of Love: What Every Woman Needs to Understand by Michael French.

And of course, check out http://www.DontDateHimGirl.com

Ahhh, the secret language of men… it’s so hard for women to decode this mysterious language. Here are a few common things men say to women when dating and what they really mean.

1. I’m not ready for a commitment. Translation – he’s not ready for a commitment with you. If he were, he’d commit, even if he didn’t intend to.

2. I’m still friends with my ex. This is actually a good thing. If a woman is friends with a man after a break-up, it means that he didn’t hurt her, he didn’t cheat on her and he didn’t break her heart. Trust us, if he had done all of these things, his ex would never be his friend.

3. Why does he say he’s going to call, but then never does. Simple translation here – he’s either not interested and won’t ever call or is taking his time and making you wait a bit. If it’s the former, you’ll know after a week or so and your phone hasn’t rung.

Log on to DontDateHimGirl.com for more great morsels of love candy! http://www.DontDateHimGirl.com

Valentine’s Day has come and gone. Now it’s time to focus on love. If you’re single and looking, are you really ready to be in a relationship with a man? In order to be successful at love and dating, you’ve got to first love yourself. Easier said than done, right?

For women, it’s often hard to always be confident, to feel like we are worthy of the good things that come to us and to love ourselves for who we are, because we always think that who we are isn’t good enough.

Why are women this way? It’s hard to say. If you’ve grown up in an environment where you weren’t valued as a child, if you were abused or otherwise made to feel inadequate, you may have a problem loving yourself. In my case, my childhood wasn’t a bed of roses by any means and I tended to date guys who tried to hurt or abuse me. Once I got my self-esteem in check, I realized that I was worthy of good things in life and that I did not have to tolerate abuse and violence from a man. I was worthy of a good guy and eventually I found one.

Here are a few tips that might help you love the person you see in the mirror every morning.

1. Live a Lush Life. Remember that life is full of surprises, disappointments, good times and bad. There’s no way to really tell what’s going to come around the corner on any given day, no matter how well we plan. So try to focus on the present moment you’re in and enjoy it. Take time to notice nature, flowers, help a person in need, practice random acts of kindness to people you don’t even know. This will help you to enjoy life and boost your self-esteem.

2. Don’t Diss Yourself, Girl! Women have a tendency to put themselves down or minimize their contributions to things. Don’t do it! If you’ve done a good job, except your praise. You earned it and you deserve it. Don’t ever sell yourself short in life or in a relationship with a guy.

3. Show Yourself Some Love. I want you to start doing something today that I know is going to help you in the future. Pick one day of the week and give yourself something beautiful. Something from you for you. It could be something as simple as a gorgeous flower or perhaps it’s something you’ve had your eye on for a while. Remember that you deserve everything wonderful in life. There’s no reason why you don’t. Treat yourself with love and the guy in your life will do the same. And if he doesn’t, you’ll be able to spot him and kick him to the curb quick!

–Tasha Cunningham, tasha@dontdatehimgirl.com

Here are 3 things that both you and your honey should do every day to foster that warm fuzzy feeling of trust between you!

1. Keep your word. Even if you’re just going down the street to pick up some milk and you tell your guy you’re going to be home in 20 minutes, don’t call him 2 hours later with a story about what happened and why you didn’t keep your word. A big part of trusting someone is knowing that what they’re telling you is the truth.

2. Don’t open old wounds. Every couple has arguments, resentment and things that have happened in the past that neither is very proud of, but if either one of you keeps rehashing it in every argument you have, it’s not going to make things any better and it certainly won’t build trust, especially if you’ve promised each other that what happened in the past stays in the past. When you keep bringing it up, it’s like you lied to your partner when you told him you wouldn’t dredge up past hurts.

3. Don’t overreact. Say you find out that your guy has done something that you don’t agree with. Instantly, you are angry because you consider whatever he’s done to be insensitive, hurtful, etc. Wait! Before you react, stop and count to 30, take 3 deep breaths and look at the situation. Was is really as bad as you thought? Your partner has to be able to trust that when you have an argument or disagreement, you’re not going to fly off the handle and end the relationship. The bottom line is that building trust isn’t easy, but there are things you can do to make it happen. All it takes is a little practice and a loving heart! � Tasha Cunningham, tasha@dontdatehimgirl.com.

Why do we women ignore our guts when it comes to guys and dating? Find out and learn to trust your intuition! Here’s how!

Hey ladies! How many times have you dated a guy and got that feeling deep in the pit of your stomach that something just wasn’t right? Like many women do, you ignored the signs and kept dating him, only to discover that everything you thought about the guy was dead-on.

So, how can we women stop ignoring our intuition? That’s why Mother Nature gave it to us! Here are 3 ways to listen to your gut every time!

1.  Don’t fight the feeling. When feel that gnawing in the pit of your stomach telling you that something’s not right, immediate stop and acknowledge. Recognize that you don’t feel right about this guy and make a mental note of it.

2.  Stop seeing a guy you don’t necessarily feel good about. If you’re not totally into a guy, don’t date him. It’s just going to be a waste of his time and yours. You’re never going to find the perfect guy, but you may just find one that’s right for you if you listen to your gut.

3.  Practice trusting that gut feeling. Trusting your gut takes practice. We as women are so used to ignoring it until it’s too late, that we’ve got to practice, practice, practice and soon you’ll get the hang of it. — Tasha Cunningham, tasha@dontdatehimgirl.com

So what do you do when the guy you’re daitng does something to upset you? Here are 5 ways to avoid the drama and fight fair!

1. Just stop – if you find yourself in a  situation where your guy is making you angry, stop. Just stop and distract yourself by counting, saying the alphabet or spelling your name and taking a deep breathe while you do it. The point it to take you out of the moment of anger and into one of calm.

This will help you think clearly so you can deal with the conflict at hand.

2. Make it a conversation – when you yell at your guy, he can’t hear a word you’re saying. Think about it. When your guy is upset with you, do you REALLY pay attention to what he’s saying? Probably not, so instead of yelling, try talking, keeping your voice at a normal tone the whole time as you calmly tell your guy what’s on your mind.

3. Say his name – don’t call your guy anything other than his name when you get into an arguement. It may be tempting to tell him what an idiot he is, but don’t. Calling each other names when you’re upset is corrosive to your relationship. Remember, this is the guy you love and even in a fight, you have to show each other respect.

4.  Don’t bring up past sins – focus on the argument at hand, now what your guy did to you six months ago.

5. Leave him alone – at the outset of an argument, if you don’t think you’ll be able to handle it without yelling and calling him names, it’s okay to walk away or leave the room to give yourself a chance to calm down. Your guy should do the same. — Tasha Cunningham

Here are three ways to tell if his anger could hurt you.

1. His reactions don’t match the infraction – if your guy blows up at your for small things, he’s got a problem with anger. For instance, say you burn dinner one night accidentally, demeaning and hurting you for burning a meal isn’t an appropriate reaction.

2. His favorite emotion is furious – if every little thing that goes wrong sends your guy flying into a rage, there is a chance that you could get hurt, too.

3. He can’t stop talking – if you’re with a guy who constantly talks about the people who’ve annoyed, hurt or infuriated him, he’s got a problem that could put you in harm’s way. — Tasha Cunningham